My mother-in-law and I do not have a relationship, right now. During the time that Anton and I were dating, she was "cool." The day I told her that Anton asked me to marry him made the change.
Maybe about two years into our marriage, I asked Anton why his mother did not like me. "I don't know," he responded. I wanted to know why so that I could work on making things right for us, (Anton included). It took him a "minute" to ask her, but when he did, WOW, I felt worse.
Mom-in-law stated that she felt as if I was taking her son away from her and that she doesn't think that any woman will ever be good enough for her son. So with my sassy attitude, I acted as if I didn't care and had nothing else to do with her.
Upon the understanding of husband and wife being one flesh, Genesis 2:24, I repented of how I felt about Anton's mother and decided that I needed to try again. I wrote a letter asking her if I may call her "mom." Her simple reply was, "I never wanted any daughters." Why can't I have a relationship with my mother-in-law that my mommy has with hers and my daddy with his, I thought?
Ruth's account is inspiring. When I first read it, I thought that chick was crazy! How is she going to tell her mother-in-law that she is going to follow her, die where she dies and worship her God, Ruth 1:16-17? Ruth even said that she would be buried where Naomi would be buried, WHOA! What's inside the heart of Ruth that prompts her to have such a devoted heart to her dead husband's mother?
Here's a woman, who does not know God, (Ruth was a Moabite. Moabites refused passage to Israel, hired Balaam to curse Israel and worshipped Chemosh), expressing love and devotion to her mother-in-law. And I, Larie, professing Christianity, wanted nothing prosperous for my mother-in-law. I just wanted her to leave us alone.
I think that I placed expectations on my mother-in-law that she is not able to carry out. I was looking for her to "meet me halfway, " when I should have gone ALL the way, and continued to go further if needed. Our relationship will be our own, without the influence of what I "think" it should be based on the relationships I am accustomed to.
I'm not done with this post, I think it's gonna be a mini-series. I want to take it slow.