Each evening before bed, I advise my school-aged children to pack their book bags, get a jacket, and place it all by the front door. This way, in the morning, all that should happen is, get dressed, eat, and pack lunches. It should go this way...
This morning, as usual, I flipped the switch to turn the bedroom light on, pulled the covers from "Cameron," slid my hand over the top bunk and gently patted "Evelyn." Both barely stirred, so I tapped "Evelyn" a little harder and physically lifted "Cameron" from the bed and led him to the living room to get his clothes that had been laid out the evening prior, (another tactic to eliminate chaos in the morning), instead he stretched across the couch! "Evelyn" finally got up, got her clothes and went into the bathroom. As I scrambled eggs, placed bread in toaster oven, & filled two cups with orange juice, I encouraged "Cameron" to get up; he didn't move!
"Evelyn" completed her bathroom duties and made it to the kitchen table just as I was plating. Again, speaking to "Cameron," "Get up man & come eat so you can get dressed." He got up, but he starts to get dressed! I thought, "Ok, suit yourself and chew on cold eggs, (gross)!" When "Evelyn" finished, I began combing her hair then "Cameron" finally made it to the table. He finished, put his lunchbox in his backpack, went to get his jacket, (that should have been already at the front door from last night!), and tied his shoes. I asked him to retrieve "Evelyn's" shoes from the bedroom while I finished up her hair. Just as I put the last barrette on, I heard the school bus!
"The Bus!" I exclaimed, "Go 'Cameron'!" I told "Evelyn" that she'd just have to put her shoes on on the bus. That's when she bee-lined for the kitchen and snatched her folder from the counter that should have already been placed in her backpack last night! She shot me a look like, "I know, I know! I didn't do what I should have!" As my son darted out the door he grabbed his sister's jacket & book bag saying, "I got your stuff!"
I'm so glad that their bus stop is just at the end of our driveway! They both giggled as they ran to the bus. All I could do was wave at the bus driver and shake my head. But how about a five minutes later I noticed a white sneaker in the middle of the living room floor...it belongs to "Evelyn!" In her haste, she'd forgotten to grab both shoes! Can you believe that I burst into tear-jerking laughter?
Sadly, I do not know the bus' route so I have to wait a while and just meet up with them at the school! So, that's why I have the time to type this before I wake "Janelle" and head to the elementary school. I tell ya', I believe this one is truly "One for the books!"
Update as of 0851: Just returned from the school to deliver ONE shoe. The secretary wanted to know how she got out of the house with only one shoe and she laughed as she said, "I should take you to the back!" She called down to the 3rd grade classroom and asked the teacher if she had a student in there with only one shoe on, and right when she said that, the classroom assistant, (coming from around the corner), said, "Yes we do!" She had a pair of pink flip-flops in her hand and explained through her laughter that she'd just called me and got no answer so headed to the office to find some shoes for "Evelyn" to wear!
Then, to top it off, a parent of one of "Cameron's" classmates saw me in the parking lot and said to "Janelle," "Oh, you have Dora on your shoes & you must have put them on yourself because they're on the wrong feet." I stopped mid-stride, belted out in an "Aaaaaahhhhhhh! I don't believe this" type of laughter and told the lady that I was actually the one who put the shoes on and told her why I was at the school. She too found it funny and commented that shoes must not be in my "plan" for the day! However, she topped my story by sharing with me that her daughter is late to school today because their dogs got out this morning as she was getting dressed and she chased them around the neighborhood with no bra or shoes on!
Hilariously, I hand over the award for "Most Funniest & Entertaining Morning" from the "Mothers of Elementary Children" category! LOL